A SHOT IN THE DARK

Well the Swine Flu vaccine finally made it to the Island. This is good since they are predicting a second wave to come through. I survived the first wave but since I'm going to be on an airplane next week I decided it couldn't hurt to get the shot. This time the clinics were held in each town, they only had about four volunteers working and it only took three minutes. They must have had enough vaccine because the Community Health Nurse spoke at the Woman's Club (that's another blog) and she had an entire cooler full in case anyone had been missed.

I've decided in the future I'll just encourage all my friends to get the shot then I'll be safe. If they don't get sick neither will I!

A SHOT IN THE DARK

I got my flu shot in November. As with everything else the Vineyard does off season they turned it into an all Island song and dance. They said it was a pandemic drill and would be this way from now on. I always thought a drill was a once in a while thing just so everyone would know what to do if necessary. I guess I was wrong.

I've been getting flu shots on Island for the last nine years and this time was by far the most complicated. They must have had fifty gazillion volunteers running around doing pretty much the same thing. It used to be you just showed up at your local fire house and they gave you a shot. Yeah, just before you got jabbed someone would ask you if you were allergic to eggs, but that was about it for the formalities. Afterword they had hot soup, cookies and coffee for those who wanted to hang around and socialize. This was good in case you missed your own town's clinic you could go to another one since they were always held on different days.

A couple of years ago they decided an all Island clinic would be better so everyone had to truck up to the high school. Still not a problem. They'd screen you at the front door then send you to the gym for your shot. It wasn't as neighborly but still worked okay. This year with Swine Flu in the forefront of the news, the powers that be decided to prepare for a pandemic, in spite of the fact that all they had was the regular seasonal flu vaccine. Everyone, it seems, had flu phobia.

The first thing they did was set up staging areas. There was one at the Ag Hall in West Tisbury and one at Alley (formerly known as Waban) Park. I figured Oak Bluffs would be closer for me. The clinic was running from 8 to 12 and I couldn't decide when it would be the most crowded so I just went when I got up. Upon arrival at Alley Park there were signs directing me all the way around the park to an entry where they checked how many people were in the car then sent me off to line up. Now this wasn't too bad, kind of like getting on the stand-by line. Unfortunately I was in the fourth line. I cursed and wished I had brought a book. I don't think I would have gotten to read much though, since about sixty volunteers knocked on the window to make sure my previously obtained forms were filled out. I spent so much time telling them that my papers were in order that before I knew it I was on my way, following a line of cars to the high school. It seems that everyone had their favorite way to get to the school so the line disintegrated in short order. Finding my way to what was formerly the blinker light intersection I noticed that a grave error had been made. The sign for the flu clinic pointed down Barnes Road toward the airport. Since I knew this was a mistake I calmly turned left to go to the school. Of course as soon as I turned I saw a policeman blocking traffic and waving everyone back to Barnes Road. Who knew there was an access road through the state forest to the high school? Not me, obviously.

There were so many police directing traffic I started to wonder who was taking care of the rest of the Island. After passing through many more checkpoints (I bet it was easier to get into West Berlin when the wall was still up) I arrived at the spot where the walkers were separated from the non walkers. Yes, they had a drive through where the infirm could just stick their arm out the car window and quickly be on their way. Apparently I was looking pretty healthy since I was waved around the school to the parking lot. I entered through the Preforming Arts Center where I went through another gauntlet of paper checkers--how could they have possibly thought I had gotten there without already being checked a few million times?--and it was a good thing I'm healthy because from there to the gym where they were doling out the vaccine was a walk of about three quarters of a mile. Someone at the door to the gym was loudly proclaiming, "Have your coat off and sleeve up," over and over. I expected to see pandemonium but most of the nurses were looking around for their next patient. It took all of about thirty seconds to actually be vaccinated. Then of course the long walk back to my car.

There was an article in the paper the next morning describing the flu clinic. They had given 400 shots during the first hour, compared to 800 during the first hour last year. So much for pandemic drills improving performance. They had run out of vaccine by 10:30, which shouldn't have surprised me if they had inoculated all the volunteers first. The reason for the rigamarole was--why else--it was mandated by the government along with the grant money. And here I thought the whole thing was thought up by the Vineyard gas station owners.